Stag and Hen
Night Celebrations
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Pre-wedding parties
Marriage is the beginning of a whole new life together, and there
are many traditions of the bride and groom holding parties
separately with their own friends of the same sex while they are
still single usually soon before the wedding. You may not like the
idea of having a 'final fling' while you are still supposedly
unfettered, but there is nothing to stop you enjoying a unique
get-together with your own particular friends before your wedding
day.
Stag parties
Stag parties so called because only males are invited are often in
the news because of the atrocities perpetrated on the groom-to-be
in the way of practical jokes. These are often in dubious taste,
and can traditionally take the form of getting him drunk so, even
if you think you know your friends, beware! The best man is
supposed to organise the stag night; if he doesn't know all of
your close friends you may need to give him a list of whom to
invite. Never, never let him arrange a stag night for the evening
before the wedding; you may suffer nothing worse than a hangover,
but grooms have been known to wake up on their wedding morning on
a cross-channel ferry or a train to Aberdeen! Insist that the stag
night is held earlier, preferably about a week before the wedding
to let you get over any ill effects. The stag night that is
nothing more than a booze-up is crashingly boring; why not think
up something more original (or allow your best man to!) You could
have a tennis party, a trip to the theatre, a card-playing
evening, or even a fancy dress party. Or you could simply all go
out for a good meal.
In Morocco the groom has what is traditionally called 'the
cleaning of the wheat' or 'the bridegroom s day of cleaning. ,
Four flags are hoisted over the house, then bags of grain that are
to be used for the wedding feast are heaped up in the courtyard
The grain is then cleaned by unmarried girls of the family or from
the neighbourhood
Bride's parties
Bridal parties are more traditional in America than they are in
this country. In America the bride usually has a party for
everyone who will be part of the wedding party on the day provided
they are female, that is. This will mainly be for the benefit of
the bridesmaids, but the mothers of bride and groom are often
invited as well. This is a transatlantic custom that could well be
transplanted here: it is an ideal way for the bridesmaids to meet
each other and for the mothers to relax before the pressures of
the big day, and gives the bride an opportunity to stop organising
things and enjoy herself with her friends.
Bridal showers are traditional in America, too: these are parties
given by close friends of the bride where each guest brings some
small item to help the bride set up home. These are often
practical, prosaic things that might not feature on a conventional
wedding list things such as an eggtimer, pair of tights, a cookery
book, tins or packets for the store cupboard, a bulletin board,
etc. The shower may be held on one theme, for instance a kitchen
shower or a garden shower.
In Germany an 'eve of the wedding' party can be held one or a few
nights before the marriage ?'he guests are supposed to make as
much noise as possible - accomplished by the clanging of
saucepans, breaking of crockery, blowing of car horns, etc.!
Joint parties
Some couples like to host an evening or lunchtime when both sets
of parents can join them: this is a particularly good idea if the
parents haven't met before. Some couples club together and take
all four parents out for a meal, or simply have a get-together at
one of the parents' homes. If the groom's parents are having to
travel quite a way to the bride's home town and stay overnight for
one or more nights before the wedding, it is courteous for the
bride's family to entertain them for a meal. This could be at the
bride's home or it could be at a restaurant the latter will
probably produce less trouble for the bride's overworked mother,
but might stretch the purse strings even tighter in the process!
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